Praise the lord!

God is so good, y'all. i went to the doctor last week, and while i did not get the news i hoped for- it was and still is- okay. i think through a number of people in my life as well as some intense prayer time, my Abba Father has pulled me close to Himself and helped me to really see a chance to love and trust Him for real. it is so hard to let go- and i won't lie- i cannot think of anything that would make me happier than a baby right now- but at the same time, i can wait. God blessed me with an amazing moment as my doctor entered the exam room last week. he put this prayer into my heart- "Father, i want to want for me what you want for me. please give me patience and help me trust you." those of you who know me and how badly i want to be a mother know that that is not me all on my own. that is God. So for now i am gonna focus on getting healthy spiritually, physically and emotionally. the physical part is requiring its own level of patience, but that's a story for another entry.